The Toughest Parts of Parenting a Daughter

   I thought I'd go ahead and write about this to get it out of my system. Father's Day is coming up. Finding an old picture I took years ago brought this to mind. I would prefer if they'd have a Dad's Day, cause being a father is the result of a random meeting between a sperm and an egg. That's not what this is about though.
   Being a dad is intentional. It's not the result of having too much to drink in a bar and fumbling around in the back seat of a car.
   You've got to be brave. Especially if your child has to drink one of those extremely expensive formulas that is really, really easy for your child to digest. It stinks going in, it stinks worse coming out.

Yeah, you get the idea. It reeks. I think it contains sulfur or something.

   Changing the diaper on a son is easy, you just have to be really quick and dodge the water pistol. Changing a girl is different. You have to make sure you wipe the right way. I know because the doctor told me this whenever I took her to the doctor. 

   "Okay, but she's got a runny nose, can you look at that? It's what she's here for."

   You manage to survive that part of life. Neither one of you is left permanently scarred.

   Then it happens. A friend told me about this. 

   His daughter called with the scariest words he'd ever heard. 

"Dad, I need pads." 

"You need to call your mom" 

"She's on a trip"

   I just ran with it from there

   You can do this. It's no big deal. You've gone and picked them up for your wife. You get your sunglasses and ball cap. Your jacket with a hood. Because you've got to not be recognized. You walk to the aisle and........

   You realize that you know your daughter's favorite song, you know her best friend, you know her favorite food, but you don't know what brand she uses. You don't know what style. You try calling your wife. She won't answer. You text her. She doesn't answer. You're standing in the middle of the 'girl stuff aisle' like a deer caught in the headlights. So you text your daughter to find out. She replies. 

   You make the selection, then go to the first aid aisle because you're a MAN. You've been married for years and you know if she needs stuff from 'that aisle' she probably needs aspirin or acetaminophen or ibuprofen or one of those pms relief pills. Then you realize you don't know what brand of those she uses either, so you grab one of each and check out.

   You walk to the front to check out and hope that the cashier that you always use ISN'T there because if she sees you buying a different brand than what you usually do she'll tell your wife you may be cheating on her. Luckily she's not there so you get checked out and go home.

   You go to your daughter's room, open the door just enough to throw the bag in, and then go hide in your room. And then you and her about making any contact with each other for the next 2 weeks.

   I get through and he is just staring at me so I asked "What?"

  He said, "I never thought about the cashier."

  Now I'm laughing. And I hope you are too.

   But the scariest part is yet to come. Cause someday they're going to get married (I hope)

   Maybe they'll do me a favor and just elope.

As always:
Thanks for Reading!
Thanks for Praying!
Thank You for Your Support!

Join Robinhood. Use my link. If you sign up, you get one share of stock, I get one share of stock. There's no guarantee of what the stock will be.

Get Stock, Help Nelson Get Stock!